Every year, the international affiliates of the Make-A-Wish Foundation fulfill the dreams of over 15,000 children. This happens in fifty countries and on six continents around the world. Children are given the opportunity to be firefighters, astronauts, to fly in fighter jets, or just spend a day with their family at a place like Disneyland. All of these things are done for children who are seriously ill, and who are likely to die. It is an opportunity to honor them and their lives, by providing a moment of joy in a life that is otherwise surrounded by grief and pain. It is done out of love for the individual, and a knowledge of who they are that allows them to find the one thing that will bring joy.
Now, I know you’re probably thinking, what exactly does today’s Gospel reading have to do with fulfilling the dying wishes of children. And I can tell you, the only reason this popped into my head is because of the similarities to what Mary was doing for Jesus. She knew he was going to die. Somehow, she just knew, and when he came to her house she fell down at his feet and she washed them with perfume, and dried them with her own hair.
Now, washing the feet of your guests was a requirement in the old hospitality laws. It showed respect to visitors, and it provided them with hospitality. But this wasn’t just a standard foot washing. Mary pulled out perfume made of pure nard. That’s the stuff they use to make myrrh. And she took this perfume and she anointed Jesus’ feet with it.
This isn’t just a regular foot washing of a guest in your house. There’s several things wrong with this scenario. First, while washing the feet of the guests in your house, this was not something that women did for men because it was considered too intimate. After all, Jesus was not her husband.
Second, women at this time were not supposed to let their hair down in public, and here Mary has not only let her hair down, but she is using her hair to dry up Jesus’ feet.
Third, this was not just a regular foot washing, because it says that Mary anointed Jesus’ feet with this perfume. In the scriptures, we find that anointing is something that is reserved for those that are becoming prophets. (check) We see that it is reserved for those that are being crowned king (check). And finally, anointing is reserved for the burial of the dead.
And finally, of course, was the fact that this stuff was expensive. This wasn’t just a last minute gift purchase at your local department store. This perfume was worth almost a year’s salary. It was an extravagant gift.
Nevertheless, Mary anointed Jesus’ feet with this perfume, because she loved Jesus. Because she respected Jesus. And, because she somehow knew that this would likely be the last time she would be able to honor Jesus before he died.
And so she threw out all the cultural expectations of her time regarding what women could and could not do. She threw out caring about what the others might think of her inappropriate behavior. She threw caution to the wind, so that she could express her love, her devotion, and her loyalty to Jesus in one final act of blessing.
And Judas said, “What a waste!”
Despite Mary breaking these cultural norms, these expectations of women, the one thing that Judas picked up on was that this stuff was ridiculously expensive. And he asks: “Should we have sold this stuff and then given the money to the poor?”
To be honest, that’s a fair question. Whenever I read this passage, that’s exactly where my mind goes too. Wouldn’t that have been a good thing to do? Why waste something that could have benefited so many people on one small display of affection?
And then we come to the clarification in the passage. One that casts Judas as a thief. And then this question makes sense, right? Or does it? The one thing to note about this clarifying verse is that it is in parentheses, which is just the bible translation team’s way of telling us that this was added afterwards. It was added once Judas’ actions had been known, and the disciples could put this into the narrative because now they understood; after Judas’ betrayal of Jesus, the truth came out.
Another interesting thing to note is that we don’t hear a peep from the other disciples. If they had understood what was going on, they probably would have jumped in and defended Mary’s actions. But, in fact, several of them were probably thinking about Mary’s behavior and wondering why Jesus would allow her to do such a thing. And the others were probably agreeing with Judas, since that’s where most of our minds go when we read this passage. They were probably so confused at what was happening that they were too afraid to question Jesus. And then Judas makes his comment about helping the poor. And they probably nodded their heads in agreement.
And it makes sense, right? The disciples shared everything in common, and worked for the good of all. It would have made sense to them to use this hidden wealth of one of the followers of Jesus in service to the poor. Again, I probably would have been right there with them, thinking that Judas had a good idea, and also: what was Mary thinking? They other disciples may not have wanted to steal from the common purse, but they probably had the same thought as Judas did, and that’s why they probably felt the need to add in this clarification of Judas’ comment. A comment that at first sounds charitable, but then is eclipsed by what Jesus says in response.
And Jesus does respond, first by defending Mary, and letting them know that she was the only one that seemed to know that Jesus was heading to Jerusalem to die. And he responds finally with what probably sounded like a cryptic response to all the others: “You will always have the poor with you, but you will not always have me.”
It sounds cryptic when you think like Judas, and quite possibly what the other disciples were thinking too. And it sounds cryptic until we take into consideration this sidebar that Judas was not thinking of the poor and being charitable, but was thinking of himself, and looking to take a bit of the profit of the sale and line his own pockets. It sounds cryptic, until we look at the behavior of Mary, and compare it to Judas.
Jesus responded, “You will always have the poor with you, but you will not always have me.” He admits that he is going to die soon, and that Mary, who wanted to save this perfume up for the day of his burial, already knew what the other disciples had not seemed to grasp yet – that Jerusalem would be the place of his death.
Jesus was saying, “Spend time with me. That’s what I want. This is what Mary has done.”
He’s not saying that we shouldn’t care for the poor, but that Judas chose self-interest, while Mary chose Jesus.
He’s not saying that we shouldn’t care for the poor, but that Mary chose the wiser option – that of honoring Jesus, and showing kindness to a friend, and recognizing that Jesus’ mission in the world was about to involve his death.
Jesus is not saying that we should not care for the poor, but that there is a time for celebration, and also a time for planning, for working, for building up the kingdom. But when you are about to lose someone, then you celebrate the present moment, and you find joy in being with them.
Mary was so close to Jesus that she knew how to honor him, even as she also knew that he would be going to Jerusalem to meet his death. And she showed him the honor of anointing him as the prophet and the king she knew him to be. She showed him that honor at the expense of her own reputation and social standing, all because she knew that she needed to take advantage of the here and now.
And Judas said, “What a waste!”
And so that leaves us with the same question that the Season of Lent always asks of us. What drives us? What motivates us? What do we honor, and what do we value?
Will we be motivated by self-interest like Judas?
Will we be confused, and unsure how to act? Not really defending Mary, and only sort of agreeing with Judas? Kind of halfway, and therefore silent?
Or will we be like Mary? Throwing caution to the wind, to embrace the feet of Christ?
[This sermon was delivered at St. Alban’s Episcopal Church in Wickenburg, AZ on April 6, 2025.]
